Duh

I had a mini epiphany this morning. No, it wasn't life changing, but it was enough to get me thinking.

For over two weeks now, I've been tracking my calories, writing down what I eat in a food journal, and weighing myself (almost) every day. In case my last post wasn't enough of an indication, it hasn't been fun. Feeling like a slave to a number and having minor anxiety any time I eat something feels a little demeaning, and not seeing the number go down on the scale is disheartening. But perhaps I've been going about it all wrong.

So far, I haven't really eaten “diet” food. Instead, I've mostly been eating what I normally would eat, but just trying to make the portions smaller and stay under the 2,000 calorie limit. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I took this approach partly because I wasn't ready to give up my favorite foods yet and I wanted to figure out a way to make calorie counting work without restricting myself too severely. But I also wanted to track my regular eating patterns to give the doctor an idea of what I normally eat, rather than look like a dieting angel on paper even if I don't normally eat that way.

Back to this morning: I was driving to work and I felt awful because of the combination of alcohol and corned beef in my system. I could almost hear my stomach contents sloshing around. I realized that the reason I felt so bad was 100% my own fault because of binging on greasy food the night before. Granted, it was a holiday, and who doesn't want corned beef and potatoes on St. Patrick's Day? But a friend had also brought asparagus and a spinach salad. Equally delicious and much healthier. Had I eaten more of that and less of the other stuff, I probably wouldn't have had all the nasty side effects the next day.

But then what do I do after having these thoughts? Get a greasy fast food breakfast to soak up all the leftover alcohol, of course! Ugh. It looks like that college trick no longer works on me. It tasted good, but I didn't feel any better.

Now, when I say I haven't changed my eating habits, I don't mean that I normally eat all junk all the time. I choose fruit and cottage cheese and veggies as sides instead of chips. I drink water almost exclusively, save for my morning coffee and my occasional late night alcoholic beverages. I cook with a lot of vegetables and lean proteins, and I try to pick healthy menu options when I go out. But I don't intentionally buy or cook items that have proven health benefits if there's an easier, faster, fattier option more readily available. So when I decided on the drive home to start making changes to make calorie counting less terrible, it was a huge DUH moment.

At work, I read an article about 24 healthy food swaps that are easy and cheap. For instance: I LOVE cheese and crackers. I can eat them any time of day or night. One of the first suggestions in the article? Swap out the crackers for apple slices. Um ... obviously. Why didn't I think of that? I'm notorious for buying a bag of apples and then letting half go to waste because I never know what to do with them. If I eat apple slices instead of crackers, I still get my cheese, plus an additional boost of fiber and vitamins, minus all the refined carbs.

There aren't any more excuses for me to not be eating healthier things. I'm already accustomed to buying brown rice, so I might as well make the swap to quinoa. I have packets of flax meal in my cabinet I could very easily add to my morning oatmeal. I like poppy seeds, so I'm sure adding chia seeds to meals won't be that big of an adjustment. I love pasta, but I might as well try spaghetti squash to see what all the fuss is about. Why do I cook with butter when I could cook with the coconut oil languishing behind the soup cans? I work across the street from a health food store. There's no reason I can't stock up on things there before heading home instead of trekking all the way out to Hy-Vee, right?

And on that note, I need to stop making excuses for not exercising or waking up earlier, either. One of the reasons I go without breakfast or get crap from the drive-thru is because I don't have much time in the mornings to make something. If I woke up just a half hour earlier, I could cook a healthy bowl of oatmeal or an egg and veggie scramble before I shower. I might even be able to fit in a morning walk. Revolutionary!

I need to quit thinking that I'm still in college. Part of being an adult is making responsible adult decisions. They're not always fun, but they count. Here's to turning over a new leaf.